A Mirror is Harder to Hold by Jon Foreman

You could stay a while longer
We could stay up and talk about last summer
We could go down to the water
Watch the sunset going under
It's not that I'm a stranger to lonely moments
I've had my share of those
Please don't go
Please don't leave me alone
A mirror is so much harder to hold

I could try and point the finger
But the glass points in my direction
Sure you've got your sharp edges
But my wounds are for my own reflection
You've got nothing I could ever hold against you
I've got fatal flaws to call my own
Please don't go
Please don't leave me alone
A mirror is so much harder to hold

I met a man who's looking for perfection
Said he'd never met a girl who's good enough
His eyes are getting old like they'd love to love again
Such a lonely man
Such a lonely man

I see him in my reflection
Taking steps towards me these days
So I hold you that much closer
And pray we don't throw this away
It's not that I'm a man who couldn't love you
I know what these arms are for
Please don't go
Please don't leave me alone
A mirror is so much harder to hold
A mirror is so much harder to hold
Please don't go
Please don't leave me cold
A mirror is so much harder to hold

My Love, My Enemy by Dave Barnes

What do you say?

Let's give it up now and just be done
Maybe we're afraid
Of all that we will and won't become

It's hard to believe
The one closest to me
Can feel so far away

You're my pleasure, you're my pain
You're my sunshine, you're my rain
You're my darkest night lost at sea

You're the shadows, you're my light
You're the one that I need tonight
You are a stranger still to me
You're my lady, my life, my love, my enemy

Every day
We come together or come undone
Every time I break
Tell me again how far we've come

It's hard to believe
The one closest to me
Can feel so far away, so far away

You're my pleasure, you're my pain
You're my sunshine, you're my rain
You're my darkest night lost at sea

You're the shadows, you're my light
You're the one that I need tonight
You are a stranger still to me
You're my lady, my life, my love, my enemy

We're changing, it's painful
Into something good
We're changing, it's painful
But it's good

You're my pleasure, you're my pain
You're my sunshine, you're my rain
You're my darkest night lost at sea

You're the shadows, you're my light
You're the one that I need tonight
You are a stranger still to me
You're my lady, my life, my love, my enemy

My love, my enemy
My love, my enemy

Remember when....

There weren't cell phones? If anyone had one, it was a Zack Morris style cell phone like this...



This past weekend, my phone fritz-ed out on me. I went to the Verizon store and they told me 2 things. "The good news, is that your phone is under warranty so you don't have a buy a new one, the bad news is that we don't have any in the store so we need to ship one to you, and it will probably come on Tuesday at the earliest...."

My initial thoughts were....cool I don't have to drop $200 on a new phone, and dang I won't have a cell phone for 5 days??? How am I going to update my twitter account, and what if I miss a text message? I eventually embraced the idea and it has been really freeing. I was on my weekend away so it kind of added to the fact that I didn't have any real responsibility for the weekend. During the weekend I had a flashback of what it was like when we didn't have cell phones. I was trying to plan to meet up with my friend Ryan. We had to plan ahead and stick to our word. We made plans to meet at a certain place at a certain time and we couldn't call any audibles. So I waited a few minutes at our meeting spot but he eventually rolled in. Compared to nowadays when we would have been like...alright I'll call you after church and we'll figure something out, and then texts and calls immense (very dangerous while driving btw) and eventually we rendezvous.

One of the big things that I get frustrated with about college students is that they are non-committal. You can plan a meeting or an event and they don't commit to going to it, and if they do there is always the fear of getting a call or a text a few minutes before saying..."hey, something came up so I can't make it." Maybe cell phones have helped create this mentality. You couldn't really do this back in the day because there wasn't a way to instantly access someone. You could call them at there house or work, but if they already left to meet up with you then there was no way to get in touch with them except to meet up with them.

I'm not saying I'm going to be one of those "freaks" that don't have a cell phone, but I do miss the simplicity of not having one. Access to a phone means that you can call anyone at anytime virtually, but that also means that someone can access you immediately. No matter what you're doing. You could be in a really important meeting, going to the bathroom it doesn't matter because your phone is always on you. Also with these new smart phones....which I have, you get texts, but can also get updates about twitter, facebook, and emails. My phone is constantly going off all throughout the day because of emails, and throughout the night too. It's almost like I can't ever get away. (I just had a realization that I am old...and I am having a "back when I young" moment....)

Have we created a system that is too busy and cluttered for our own good?

1, 2, deep breath 3

Wow,
Has it really been 2 plus years? It has flown by and somehow I'm in my last year of being an RD at Geneva. Little did I know what I was getting myself into, but now I can reflect and look back at the awesome blessings that God has provided.

- I knew almost no one when I came here. Now I feel like I am a part of this community. I can't go anywhere without running into someone I know. This community is something that I don't want to take for granted. The students, the co-workers, it's all a great blessing to work among such really Godly people. My sense of belonging is off the charts here. I don't credit any of it to my doing, but definitely something that God has provided.

-Grad School is almost done. Almost is a relative term, but it has been so good for me. You should see my apartment full of books for class and not for class. Yes I'm reading for pleasure now....amazing. I have somehow gained the perspective that reading is knowledge, and knowledge is power. I'm actually thinking about doing a literature based final project so I can be more well read in the topic of Asian Students in Higher Education. huhwhaaat? I'm choosing to read? Long gone are the days that I would complain about reading 25 pages for my business classes, but now I'm actually craving more knowledge and looking for books to read. This definitely is a God thing. God striking accord in my prideful little head about the passions and gifts I have and how I need to continue to hone and acquire more knowledge so I can represent him better.

-Family. So much has happened with my family in the last 2 years I've been here. My grandmother passed away, my uncle lost his battle with cancer, my mother had cancer and is now in remission (Praise the Lord). Somehow in amidst all these trials my immediate family has been a huge part of my work at Geneva and in Western PA. My parents got to come out to camp and experience that huge influence in my life, my parents and sister got to host a group of students from Geneva for a mission trip to LA, and in a couple of weeks my parents are coming out for a visit for homecoming and fall break to experience the fall colors and just get a first hand experience of my life as a Residence Director. At first I was hesitant in my parents coming out for such a long period of time, but I think it will give them a bigger perspective of what the heck I do. It's kind of like how I described before in previous posts about camp. You can't describe it, you just have to experience it. That pretty much defines my job as an RD. God choosing things that I wouldn't choose for myself is the theme of how my family has been interwoven the last two years. It's been very hard at times, but for his plan and his glory.

So what's next? It's still a long time away, but it is hard for me not to try to think ahead. To figure out what God has in store and where the heck I will be. Will I be working at a big University? Will I continue to work in Christian Higher Ed? In what field? Residence Life, Multicultural Services, Leadership? East Coast, West Coast, Midwest out of the COUNTRY!?!?
I have no idea, and I guess that's the beauty of it. It's not up to me. I just have to jump and trust the Lord.

One Day- Matisyahu

This song has been a real encouragement to me lately....

One Day- Matisyahu

Sometimes I lay under the moon
And I thank God I'm breathing
Then I pray don't take me soon
'Cause I am here for a reason

Sometimes in my tears I drown
But I never let it get me down
So when negativity surrounds
I know someday it'll all turn around because

All my life I been waiting for
I been praying for, for the people to say
That we don't want to fight no more
They'll be no more wars
And our children will play, one day

It's not about win or lose 'cause we all lose
When they feed on the souls of the innocent blood
Drenched pavement keep on moving
Though the waters stay raging

And in this life you may lose your way
It might drive you crazy
But don't let it phase you, no way

Sometimes in my tears I drown
But I never let it get me down
So when negativity surrounds
I know someday it'll all turn around because

All my life I been waiting for
I been praying for, for the people to say
That we don't want to fight no more
They'll be no more wars
And our children will play, one day

One day this all will change
Treat people the same
Stop with the violence down with the hate
One day we'll all be free and proud
To be under the same sun
Singing songs of freedom like

My Utmost for His Highest...entry for Sept. 6

The Far-Reaching Rivers of Life

He who believes in Me . . . out of his heart will flow rivers of living water —John 7:38

A river reaches places which its source never knows. And Jesus said that, if we have received His fullness, “rivers of living water” will flow out of us, reaching in blessing even “to the end of the earth” (Acts 1:8 ) regardless of how small the visible effects of our lives may appear to be. We have nothing to do with the outflow— “This is the work of God, that you believe. . .” ( John 6:29 ). God rarely allows a person to see how great a blessing he is to others.

A river is victoriously persistent, overcoming all barriers. For a while it goes steadily on its course, but then comes to an obstacle. And for a while it is blocked, yet it soon makes a pathway around the obstacle. Or a river will drop out of sight for miles, only later to emerge again even broader and greater than ever. Do you see God using the lives of others, but an obstacle has come into your life and you do not seem to be of any use to God? Then keep paying attention to the Source, and God will either take you around the obstacle or remove it. The river of the Spirit of God overcomes all obstacles. Never focus your eyes on the obstacle or the difficulty. The obstacle will be a matter of total indifference to the river that will flow steadily through you if you will simply remember to stay focused on the Source. Never allow anything to come between you and Jesus Christ— not emotion nor experience— nothing must keep you from the one great sovereign Source.

Think of the healing and far-reaching rivers developing and nourishing themselves in our souls! God has been opening up wonderful truths to our minds, and every point He has opened up is another indication of the wider power of the river that He will flow through us. If you believe in Jesus, you will find that God has developed and nourished in you mighty, rushing rivers of blessing for others.

Jumping back into "Normal"

So as I mentioned in my previous post, it would probably be a while since I could post another entry because of camp. I did get a chance to change my blogs format but I never got a chance to reflect or write a post, so here we go. Camp was great as I knew it would be. The group of counselors this year were amazing. One of my favorite nights of the summer was during Orientation. I was in charge of programming again and every year we have a skit night. So I divided them into groups and they were responsible for coming up with some type of skit to perform to see if we could use it for the campers a few weeks later. I have never laughed so hard in my life, seriously. It's not even that the skits were that funny, but everyone participated, and everyone felt comfortable making a fool of themselves. Our group of counselors bonded so much that night, and it just set the tone for the rest of the summer.
Probably one the things I miss the most is being able to play with our leadership staff's kids. Call me a sap, but I really loved playing with little Luke, Emily and Mary.
Here are a couple of pictures.


It was a bitter sweet time when I had to leave camp this year, because I think it was the last time I will be able to work at camp. All of my friends don't believe me and think that I'm pulling a Brett Farve but I honestly think I'm done. I have written numerous posts about how much that place means to me, and I could probably write for another hour about it. I think I want to leave going out on top, still loving and appreciating how special it is. I never thought I would be 28 and working at camp, but God made it happen this year and I'm forever grateful.

After camp I drove back to Geneva on a Friday, had a weekend to relax a little bit and then this past Monday we started my last RD training. I'm going into my final year as a Grad Assistant RD and my emotions are mixed. I'm starting to get excited about the school year, but am overwhelmed thinking that it's my last time around. This means a few things. I have one more year to make the most of this awesome job and continue to build relationships with students. Since it's my third year I have a lot more responsibility with regards to "making an impact on campus", and I'm finishing up my last year of Grad school. I'm obviously still very tired from a long summer at camp, but feel refreshed spiritually and mentally. One of my RA's pointed out to me that "Scott you're always tired." So I guess I will just continue to be tired for the rest of my life.

Here are a few more pictures of camp.

(Celebrating my 28th Birthday....party)

(This was the view from our porch, I spent lots of time praying, and journaling from this spot)

(Me DJing the Surprise Night Dance....oh yeah)